Palm Bay (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested after reportedly masturbating outside of a water treatment plant because he’s “dumb,” according to the Palm Bay Police Department. Full Story »
St. Augustine (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested after climbing into a Nile Crocodile enclosure at Alligator Farm and getting bit. Full Story »
Pensacola (WTFF) – A drunk, shirtless Florida Man reportedly broke into several homes looking for a fight. He eventually ran into a fence and knocked himself out. Full Story »
Gainesville (WTFF) – Thirteen Floridians were taken to area hospitals after consuming “spice.” Four were arrested. Full Story »
A Florida man hopped into his Ford F-250 and tried escaping from a tow truck while his vehicle was being repossessed. Full Story »
Titusville (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested on charges of burglary and exposing sexual organs after showing up naked on the porch of a grandma. Full Story »
Eustis (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested Wednesday night after a verbal dispute disturbed the trailer park. Full Story »
Palm Coast (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested after reportedly stripping his clothes off and challenging someone to a fight. Full Story »
Stuart (WTFF) – People are complaining about a neighbor who walks around his yard naked. Full Story »
Holly Hill (WTFF) – A Florida woman reportedly threw a beer mug at a Florida man’s head after he complained about her being in the bathroom too long. Full Story »
A Florida Man was caught on camera driving a jet ski on Normandy Boulevard in Jacksonville on Tuesday. Full Story »
Daytona Beach (WTFF) – A Florida man was shot on Friday night during an argument about a tattoo. Full Story »
Palm Coast (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested and charged with a felony after cleaning up some weed from a beach in Flagler County. Full Story »
Fort Myers (WTFF) – A Florida man and a Florida woman were arrested for a wildly romantic romp that took place on a sidewalk in broad daylight. Full Story »
Palm Coast (WTFF) – A Florida man is behind bars after reportedly attacking a woman and her son over a “Twinkie the Kid” figurine, the mascot for Twinkies. Full Story »
Vero Beach (WTFF) – A drunk Florida man arrested on a DUI charge started singing Journey on his way to jail. Full Story »
Cleveland, FL (WTFF) – A corrections officer has resigned after getting caught stealing candy from the Charlotte County Jail commissary. Full Story »
Avon Park (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested after deputies found him sleeping inside of a vehicle full of stolen items. Full Story »
Miami (WTFF) – An “illegal” party boat got busted by the feds. Full Story »
St. Petersburg (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested after allegedly throwing a bucket of feces and urine onto the floor of a 7-Eleven. Full Story »
Key West (WTFF) – A Republican from Pompano Beach was arrested after reportedly punching a bouncer and kicking a patron while shouting gay slurs at a gay bar on Duval Street. Full Story »
Fort Pierce (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested after reportedly giving his girlfriend a “wet willy.”
47-year-old Joseph Sireci is facing a battery charge for the Aug. 15 “wet willy” attack, according to an arrest affidavit collected by TC Palm.
The girlfriend told St. Lucie County sheriff’s that Sireci was drunk on the living room floor when she got home from work.
She grabbed her daughter and her boyfriend and went to another home, where the Florida Man “continued to drink and be belligerent,” according to the arrest report.
While going home, she told police that Sireci grabbed her and pulled her arm.
He “continued by giving her a ‘wet willy’ sticking his finger in her ear.”
The daughter confirmed what happened.
Sireci said he wasn’t drunk, but refused to give a written statement.
Old Media went ape over this story. It’s not every day that domestic abuse is funny. An arrest affidavit that mentions a “wet willy” is a glorious click-bait ingredient.Collecting the shekels, MSM bringing you the important news
Ocala (WTFF) – A Florida couple has been arrested after police raided their trailer. Full Story »
Gainesville (WTFF) – A Florida man is behind bars after showing up at Krispy Kreme and reportedly demanding money and donuts. Full Story »
Groveland (WTFF) – A Florida man driving around with no pants and no license is facing several drug charges. Full Story »
Clermont (WTFF) – A Florida man reportedly stole a bicycle resting outside of a Goodwill store and posted it for sale on Facebook using his personal account. Full Story »
A barefoot Floridian was caught chillin’, riding down 95 on his motorcycle. Full Story »
Clearwater (WTFF) – A Florida man who shot and killed an unarmed father over a parking lot dispute is now being charged with manslaughter. Full Story »
Altoona (WTFF) – A Central Florida couple’s several day long argument resulted in the arrest of a Florida woman. Full Story »
Tampa (WTFF) – A butthurt snowflake was arrested after showing up to his friend’s house and shooting him in the thigh and butt cheek after arguing about politics on Cuckbook. Full Story »
Jacksonville (WTFF) – A Florida man carried a gator tucked under his arm while going on a beer run. Full Story »
Back in the 70’s a Florida man fell in love with a dolphin named Dolly.
Malcolm Brenner described the experience as “almost spiritual” in a VICE article. He met the dolphin on a freelance photography assignment at Floridaland, a theme park in Sarasota. Back then he was a student at the New College of Florida.
Dolly caught his attention, and reportedly floated over to Brenner and “flipped over to present her genital slit.” He described how the dolphin then rubbed her teeth on him “in an erotic way.”
“Female dolphins are very assertive about their sexuality,” said Brenner to the VICE reporter.Dolly the dolphin was trained to ride along this boat and jump for fish. Photo courtesy of Joey Daoud
He’s now starring in a documentary called “Dolphin Lover,” a 15-minute film that tells the story of “his summer long love affair with Dolly the dolphin” over four decades ago.
Brenner lives in West Florida these day and tries to live a pretty normal life. He even has a grown daughter after “‘training’ himself to like women.” He hopes that one day zoophilia will be normal in society. He seems to like humans too, as he’s active on several dating sites.
Back in the day, it was totally legal to fuck animals in Florida. Back when America was great?
FSS 828.126 basically declares that humans are not allowed to “knowingly engage in any sexual conduct or sexual contact with an animal.”
It’s an important law to have on the books to protect animals, but it’s only a first degree misdemeanor.
Animals cannot express consent to humans. Or rather, we have no way to prove they can express consent, because we don’t speak the same language(s).
“Laws barring bestiality, such as the one recently enacted in Florida, are not wrongful limitations of sexual freedom. They rightfully protect the sexual liberties of all,” reads a Guardian article.
That pretty much says it.
Consent is everything.
Please stop fucking animals, everyone. We shouldn’t have to ask these things. Also, it’s not just Floridians. Margaret Lovatt apparently fell in love with a dolphin too.
Milton (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested after reportedly shooting at a camper for tossing a cigarette on the ground. Full Story »
Leesburg (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested for trespassing after shouting racial slurs at a clerk who asked him to pay for his coffee. Full Story »
Umatilla (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested after driving his pickup truck while intoxicated. Full Story »
Savannah, GA (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested in our neighboring state after grabbing the buttocks of a waitress who immediately tackled him. Full Story »