Their News Versus Our News

We treat the news just as seriously as any other news outlet. That’s how you know our whole society’s fucked up. News in America is basically just ridiculous entertainment carefully arranged to deceive, enrage and divide the masses. It’s powered by greed, as editors produce click-bait to sell more ads on. Since only a few […] »

State of Florida

Written by Randy W. State Of Florida: Miles and miles of strip malls with divorce lawyers, tattoos, pawn shops,etc., Wal-Marts every mile, trailer courts, trailer parks, trailer trash, malls, strip malls, mini-malls, cops, artery-clogging steak houses, McDonald’s/Wendy’s/Burger Kings every 3 blocks, constant hot/humid weather, dixie this, dixie that, little lizards climbing the trees, “neighbors” who […] »

Trip Patrol

There should be a serious constitutional amendment to legalize all drugs. Take the role away from cops so they can focus on violent crimes. Create a “trip patrol” who come equipped with mental health training to talk down “bad trips” but with a few backups who can tackle drunk people and PCP users if needed. […] »


The articles on WTF Florida often have a liberal slant. We do that on purpose because it’s funny and we do actually support many left-leaning ideas in politics, such as treatment over prison for drug addicts, free access to quality health care and education, treating our environment with respect, and generally making progress. One distinction […] »

Prison + Profit

It’s almost like arresting drug addicts and spending tax dollars to put them in overpriced storage containers only to release them later with no rehabilitation and with a record that denies them from having a good job doesn’t really work for society. Are humans actually so ignorant that they believe these efforts are effective? Or […] »

Stand Your Ground

If someone tries to assault you in any way, be sure to Stand Your Ground and place a bullet inside of them. If you let them live, they could hurt someone else. If you go through the courts, the assailant will be untouchable if they have money or political clout. Do the world a favor and exercise […] »

Liberal Twitter Feed

Show a topic that makes you angry, but one that makes you feel solidarity with other angry people. Show another one. And another. Show an ad about something that some advertiser thinks you might want to pay for, based on your data. Like-minded people agreeing with each other. BUY CRAPPY PIZZA FROM THIS GIANT CORPORATION […] »

Obligation to Kindness

From @Are0h on Remember, you are under no obligation to be kind to people that mean you harm. You do not owe civility to anyone that denies your basic human right to exist safely. It is pointless to attempt to reason with a person that is resigned to believe your suffering is necessary and […] »


Florida used to be shaped like an erect penis pointing towards Morocco until all the old people moved down and made it hang limp. Cape Dementia and The Villages hold the largest concentration in the world of retired dying waste known as Baby Boomers. »

Republicans in 2018

Republicans are brainwashed. They don’t know how to decipher between facts and lies. Republicans are willfully ignorant and intellectually lazy. Even when they are told the truth, they don’t care and refuse to look it up. If any of them had half a brain, they would know that Trump is a Populist Authoritarian. And just […] »

God Bless Florida Man

God bless Florida Man, for his crimes that hurt no one. He is truly free, something that upsets and frightens those who wish to control the masses. While Catholic priests boink little boys in the butt and church leaders use tithe money to hide the truth, Florida Man simply strips his clothes off like supralapsarian […] »

Political Promises

Hi, I’m almost every political candidate, and I promise to: ✅ Pander to my base with rhetorical phrases and uplifting but empty promises. ✅ Make you fight to keep your constitutional rights. ✅ Blame the other side. ✅ Find what pisses you off and run ads about how I’m going to change those things. ✅ […] »