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State of Florida

Written by Randy W.

State Of Florida:

Miles and miles of strip malls with divorce lawyers, tattoos, pawn shops,etc., Wal-Marts every mile, trailer courts, trailer parks, trailer trash, malls, strip malls, mini-malls, cops, artery-clogging steak houses, McDonald’s/Wendy’s/Burger Kings every 3 blocks, constant hot/humid weather, dixie this, dixie that, little lizards climbing the trees, “neighbors” who will call the cops on you at the slightest provocation, Banks every 500yds when you don’t have any money, useless spanish moss, people from other countries working public service jobs who speak a different language than you, highway billboards (for readers) too numerous to describe obscuring highway signs, most of them offering funeral / cremation deals or promoting another “lemming trap” alcohol-related trend, seniors driving 30m.p.h. in a 55 zone, uneducated/scary-looking people with tattoos, sinkholes, sleazy strip-joints, guaranteed minimum wage jobs, liquor stores every 2 blocks, “Jerry Springer” people everywhere, more cops, official state “zero tolerance” signs with a little illustration of handcuffs to rub-the-point-in (bastards), traffic lights synchronized so cops can ticket you easier, speed bumps designed to damage car suspension systems, gated communities loaded with better-than-thou people, FAT cops with mean grins, white trash from god-knows-where that just got out of prison last month usually playing their stereo loud at night so you can’t sleep, mosquitoes that fly SO fast you actually can’t swat them, snakes/alligators/fire ants/scorpions, alcohol/drug-addicted people driving, running, walking & crawling everywhere if they’re not unconscious.

An entire state without a library, museum, or cultural institution in sight for 100’s of miles but there’s always a Wal-Mart 300 yards away from you.

State of Florida

Category: Random Thoughts
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