St. Augustine (WTFF) – St. Johns County Commissioner Paul Waldron caught the coronavirus and went into septic shock after voting against a motion to mandate masks for county employees last week. »
Any “news” article that claims a “proposed bill” or “new legislation” could do this or that outrageous thing, without referencing the actual bill or providing links to House/Senate websites to let you read it, is full of shit. Most of the news in America is just inflammatory click-bait designed to pester, annoy, enrage and divide. […] »
There should be a serious constitutional amendment to legalize all drugs. Take the role away from cops so they can focus on violent crimes. Create a “trip patrol” who come equipped with mental health training to talk down “bad trips” but with a few backups who can tackle drunk people and PCP users if needed. […] »
We received a “must-run message” from our “friends” over at Sinclair Media. We don’t approve of this message, but they’re heavily armed and already shot a few of our best reporters for dissenting, so here it is: Democrats and Republicans must remain mortal enemies. Do everything in your power to destroy each other. Conservatives, do […] »
Fred Guttenberg, the father of Jaime Guttenberg who was killed in the shooting in Parkland, Fla., left, tries to shake hands with Donald Trump’s Supreme Court nominee., Brett Kavanaugh, right, during a lunch break. Kavanaugh did not shake his hand. (AP Photo/Andrew Harnik) »
Republicans are brainwashed. They don’t know how to decipher between facts and lies. Republicans are willfully ignorant and intellectually lazy. Even when they are told the truth, they don’t care and refuse to look it up. If any of them had half a brain, they would know that Trump is a Populist Authoritarian. And just […] »
In the Trump era, it’s hard to understand why people still vote Republican. Here’s your chance to really tell the truth without feeling embarrassed. Answer the poll and write more elaborate answers in the comments. All comments are 100% anonymous (unless you choose to provide your real name). »
Floridians on the left and right of politics both seem to hate the ruling elite class, but they’re too busy finding ways to destroy each other to notice. »
When I’m elected, I will put Florida first. Lots of politicians just use fancy words to lull their constituents into voting for them, but I’m different. Jobs! You stupid fuckers like jobs, right? Vote for me. »
“Shill accounts” are common on social media. They’re created and moderated by modern influence campaign employees, “shills,” who spread misinformation and strong view points in order to manipulate the actions of humans. We’re social creatures. When we see some “normal, average, real” person that kind of looks, thinks, and acts like us, we tend to […] »
It’s more than just “red tide,” a naturally-occurring microscopic alga that has been documented along Florida’s Gulf Coast since the 1840’s. Floridians are upset about the overall treatment of our environment. Mainstream media tends to downplay the effect of dumping phosphorus-laden pollutants into our ecological water system. Water moves freely along the peninsula, carrying all its […] »
Tampa (WTFF) – A butthurt snowflake was arrested after showing up to his friend’s house and shooting him in the thigh and butt cheek after arguing about politics on Cuckbook. »
Hi, I’m almost every political candidate, and I promise to: ✅ Pander to my base with rhetorical phrases and uplifting but empty promises. ✅ Make you fight to keep your constitutional rights. ✅ Blame the other side. ✅ Find what pisses you off and run ads about how I’m going to change those things. ✅ […] »
The massive, toxic algae bloom currently swirling around the peninsula of Florida has its origins in an ongoing cycle of political manipulations, kickbacks, loosening of environmental and water regulations, an aging water-transfer infrastructure in and around Lake Okeechobee, and a Governor in the pocket of Big Sugar. It all adds up to one vicious chain, […] »
We officially endorse that one dude who’s always chillaxing outside of liquor stores telling funny stories. We also endorse Florida Woman, who doesn’t take any shit from anyone. Political propaganda will be in full swing again very soon. Corrupt politicians will go on TV and ironically tell you that “many politicians are corrupt,” to make […] »
Tampa (WTFF) – It’s hard to believe that Trump supporters are even real. Either these red hatters are paid to feign stupidity so the media can irritate rational people and continue the drama, or the simulation we’re living in is broken. People can’t be this stupid. They just can’t be… or can they? »
We, the people of the State of Florida in Convention assembled, do solemnly ordain, publish and declare: That the State of Florida hereby withdraws herself from the country existing under the name of the United States of America, and from the existing Government of said country. July 16, 2018 »
Biscayne Park (WTFF) A former police chief and two officers have been charged with falsely pinning four burglaries on a teenager just to impress village leaders with a perfect crime-solving record. »
Florida is a “Sanctuary City” for old Republican Baby Boomers. It’s time we deport them all, and send them back to Michigan, Ohio, or wherever they come from. »
Technology built by smug liberals in coastal towns was used by Trump’s team to win the election, resulting in painful regret for many butthurt left-wingers. »
We officially endorse that one dude who’s always chillaxing outside of liquor stores telling funny stories. We also endorse Florida Woman, who doesn’t take any shit from anyone. »
Written by: Michael McCombs via internet post. In response to this article: Publix Engages in Memetic Warfare – So let me get this correct, you’re going to boycott Publix because they contributed $310,000 to Adam Putnam? Well guess you are also going to boycott Disney World, they donated directly to Adam Putnam too. Also, time to boycott Universal […] »
Ocala (WTFF) – The State Attorney’s Office announced that no criminal charges will be filed against Dewie Brewton, the high school teacher who made students watch and help as he drowned several animals during class. »
As a result of sifting through countless arrest affidavits and living in Florida, we are very familiar with suffering, which is a result of greed, hatred, and delusion. Occasionally our page will support movements in Florida that aim to lessen the amount of suffering in our world. Some people accuse us of being “political.” We […] »