Daytona Beach (WTFF) – Florida Man convinced his wife to conceal a plastic baggie of cocaine up her vagina while they were both sitting in the back of a cop car. Full Story »
Mount Dora (WTFF) – The “Starry Night” mural painted on a home in artsy Mount Dora is further under attack by the city. Full Story »
Just to be clear, we don’t take “political party” sides. All of them are stupid, in their own unique way. Peaceful ideals are not enough to cure the divide as the corporate machine has dug its vacuum into politics and extracts power from us for profit. We provide to them the most valuable assets in the world: our time, our attention, our excitement, our hope. Some of their vehicles are: media, the news, internet, and broadcast television.
There’s a lot of really great news networks out there. And there’s a lot of crap. We’re somewhere in the middle, okay lower, but our uniqueness makes us shine (Florida’s a magical place). We say “fuck” sometimes. We make fun of Florida Man. We make fun of dumb criminals. Some of the articles have a spin on them. If you’ve been around here a while you will notice trends. Everything comes back to the center eventually. This is essentially a comedy site: here’s your fucking disclaimer. All of the articles in our “News” category are real though, based on actual events, and provide citations or police reports. We just have a weird sense of humor and most of the stories make us laugh.
Sometimes we post serious and important stuff. Use your mind to discern between the two, and remember they are sometimes one and the same.
Not everything should have to come with a Sarcasm tag, but as a sign of the times, and due to Poe’s Law, we do use it now, just to be clear. You’re welcome. We will use this tag on heavily slanted and politicized articles to gently remind you that “we’re just kidding!”
We’re never sarcastic. Ahem. Seriously though, don’t take any of this shit too seriously. And it’s all shit. Everything is. But within that shit is beauty and laughter and goodness. So go forth, be great, and keep Florida weird.
Written by: Liberal Larry
A resource officer at Elliot Point Elementary School stupidly left her deadly gun in the bathroom. Full Story »
Written by: Republican Ralph
Liberals are always looking for a way to take away our guns. This incident will add more ammo to their attack on our Second Amendment rights. Full Story »
Okaloosa County (WTFF) – An elementary school resource officer accidentally left her service weapon in a faculty bathroom. Full Story »
Hudson (WTFF) – Two gopher tortoises were caught on video fighting in Pasco County. Full Story »
Monroe County (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested after he slashed another man with a machete over an argument that started over an unplugged power cord. Full Story »
WFLA reports that all three men involved in the Shark Case have pleaded not guilty (surprise, surprise). They will be going to court again on March 6, per Facebook post made by Adjudicate Guilty Michael Wenzel, Bo Benac, Heintz 4 Felony Animal Abuse. Full Story »