Birth Control and the Catholic Church

WTFF News would like to thank the Catholic church for their hard-line stance against birth control. Pulling out is just fine, but using “the pill” is an abomination. Obviously the “pull out method” is rather ineffective and leads to pregnancy. Because of all the unplanned pregnancies, many of the oops babies who miraculously survived into adulthood became Florida Mans and Florida Womans. We encourage reckless breeding, as it fuels the economy of fuckery, which in turn produces better headlines. Thank you for all your efforts.

Catholics and Birth Control

WTFF News would like to thank the Catholic Church for their hard-line stance against birth control. Pulling out is just fine, but using “the pill” is an abomination. Obviously the “pull out method” is rather ineffective and leads to pregnancy. Because of all the unplanned pregnancies, many of the oops babies who miraculously survived into adulthood became Florida Mans and Florida Womans. We encourage reckless breeding, as it fuels the economy of fuckery, which in turn produces better headlines. Thank you for all your efforts.

Jesus

If Jesus came back to Florida some idiot wearing a cross would probably shoot him because “he looked foreign.”

Some idiot like one of these stupid redneck assholes who decided to “Stand Their Ground” against a black man who showed up in a predominately white neighborhood. They fired a “warning shot” at the terrified Uber driver after forcing him to his knees. Luckily, the Haitian dude survived.

Imagine if Jesus came back to earth and went to Florida first … we really need the help.

The most fucked up thing about Florida is not our crazy criminals, freakish weather, or delusional drug addicts… it’s the fact that people put their selfish fears and desires far above their concern for others. Florida, you have a fucked up culture on the whole. You’re full of fathers who support and encourage police brutality. You’re full of mothers who leave their kids with weirdos to go get high. You’re full of people who believe one race is superior to another. You’re full of people who rape and murder and lie and assault women and go to church and claim atheists are the ones who are going to hell. You should be fucking ashamed of yourselves. Greed, hatred, and delusion grip tightly on many of us.

It’s good for fucked up Florida news, but bad for our souls.

But let us not fall into that same poison of thought. Day to day we see the ones who are not like this. Florida’s incredibly diverse and full of good people, but the ones who express ugliness are usually the loudest, so we tend to get drawn into their webs of negativity. We’re not all that fucked up. They don’t account for all of us.

We have a lot of cool rednecks too, so don’t let the language get in our way. Anybody can be a stupid asshole, no matter what they look like or where they come from.

Thank you to everyone who still maintains some humanity.

Please continue to encourage goodness and compassion. Be a beacon of kindness and don’t let the hatred from others corrupt you.

“Peace, Be Still.” -Mark 4:39

Bella Vista Baptist Church

bella vista baptist church
Bella Vista Baptist Church “Forgiveness Is Swallowing When You Want To Spit.”

A church in Edgewater had to change their sign about forgiveness after it was mistaken for a sexual innuendo.

“We apologize if anyone was offended,” officials from the church wrote, according to clickorlando.com.

Anti-Muslim March vs. Anti-Racism Rally – June 10, 2017 – Orlando, FL

White supremacists protesting

FYI, on Saturday, June 10th, things are going to get interesting at Valencia College East Campus.

Basically, there’s some “March Against Sharia” protest scheduled to take place in 26 cities across the nation, one of the cities being Orlando (of course, Florida). This demonstration is organized by Act for America, a known Anti-Muslim hate group classified by the SPLC.

In response to this event, there will also be an Anti-Racism Rally held at the same location…

Facebook Event Links:

March Against Sharia – https://www.facebook.com/events/1919303175005708/?active_tab=about

Anti-Racism Rally – https://www.facebook.com/events/128053611096971/?active_tab=about

Date and Location:

Saturday, June 10, 2017
10:00 AM – 2:00 PM
Valencia College East Campus
701 Econlockhatchee Trl N, Orlando, FL 32825

WTF Florida’s take on this whole thing:

So, we all know there’s no Sharia Law in the U.S. right? Good, we’re on the same page. So by that logic, we can safely conclude that we don’t really need to protest against it… because well it doesn’t exist here. The overall theme of this March Against Sharia seems to be less about “let’s help the victims of radicalism,” and more about “we don’t like Muslims, so let’s get all of our white Christian Trump voters together and bitch about it…”

Also, quite hilariously, these anti-Muslim protesters have invited disgraced professor Areej Zufari, who is “tied to terrorism,” as a key-note speaker…

Whichever side you’re on, I just ask that you remain peaceful. Enjoy the show.