So, we made this fake audition page to bring attention to how MTV’s Siesta Key endorses animal abuse:
Aaaand, we got some people signing up… here are some of the hilarious results (try to guess who thinks it’s real versus people trolling):
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?
I could care less about this show. Sounds dumb honestly. But I live there so I know a bit.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?
I’m vegan, wtf is wrong with you for even asking this question. Some messed up people you are.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?
Just moved there! Would love to meet people.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?
Flying roaches.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?
I like to abuse animals like Alex Komp, my daddy is also rich and can supply MTV with sponsors.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?
Snails preferably. They remind me of Kelsey, shes always leaving her snail trails behind.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?
I would be a great candidate because I love to drink and do drugs. I’m not much of an animal abuser but I’ve been known to smack my bitch up a bit. She’s from New England and is quite mouthy sometimes.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?
Women
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?
I live on Anna Maria – I can show the Siesta Key folks how to REALLY live it up and where the fun places in this area exist. This show is done well but misdirected on where to see the action in this area. I also am not a broke loser who needs to mooch off of my parents although I could. I have my own place and blow MY OWN money on all kinds of drugs, instead of needing to get drug money from my father. [phone number removed]
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: im not
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: What the fuck?!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I have lived in sarasota for 4 years now. Moved here from New Jersey I sell private jets by day and bartend at clasico by night. I have a wealth of knowledge of the sarasota area and surrounding beaches. I know the current star Alex and am in frequent contact with his father Gary as I am trying to sell their Jet.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve been to Siesta Key plenty of times.. Getting fucked up at the wall is the total shit. If you haven’t puked in the bathroom at Gilligans, you haven’t lived. I’ve fucked more hoes on the beach at night then I can count.. probably some guys too, I dunno I was fucking high af
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I don’t believe in torturing any life at all.. especially plants.. which is why I only eat meat. I eat the shit out of some cows.. but they aren’t tortured. I eat the fuck out of some chicken too. I eat some much chicken you’d think I was black. Oh yeah I like torturing black people.. with Trump signs.. even though I voted for Bernie the muthafucka Sanders bitch. If you don’t put me on this show, you are a basic ass bitch who needs to be pickin up hoes at Smokin Joes not at the BC. I’m out to get my raw oysters on at SKOB…. PEACE
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: becuase I can be the snooki of the show. Fat, rediculous, and the person everyone makes fun of.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Bugs. I hate them. Kill them with fire!!! Social experiments are fun too…
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Born and raised in bradenton Florida. Not new to the area of Sarasota/bradenton and I would bring that debate but not so controversial side to the show. I’m 6’7″ 265 tall athletic went to southeast high school. Played football, basketball and track. So I’m very tall, super funny and intelligent
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Growing up I use to paralyze lizards wrap them up in toilet paper and watch them burn to a fast miserable. Because you know toilet paper burn fast
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I live here and want you assholes to FUCK OFF!!! No one here wants you here!!!!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: The star from the previous show!!! Please give me 5 minutes alone with this cock sucker! If I see you filming I’m gonna make it a shit show!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve lived in Sarasota for 23 years, I’m pale as fuck, don’t own a boat and I’ve been fishing once. But I got them jokes yo
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I prefer to torture other human beings with my exsistance
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: First of all I lived here for 13 years I know alot of people I’m an outgoing people’s person, POSITIVE ALEAYS SMILING, IM A CLOWN, IM PRETTY ENTERTAINING. I GROW ON PEOPLE EASILY. I know everything that I need to Kno w about Sarasota, and Siesta Key
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: What??? If I have to choose, a shark I don’t Kno that’s harsh. I don’t like to torture animals tho
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: You should pick me to be on Siesta Key because I have a great personality and love to drink liquor
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Definitely a gold fish
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m a 5th generation circus performer, currenctly performing at La Nouba by Cirque Du Soleil in Orlando, Fl. As you know Siesta Key/Sarasota is a huge circus history area with St Armands circle, I have performed with the Flying Pages a world renowed trapeze circus family, bronze clown winner at the International Festival of Monte Carlo. I have all my friend in Siesta Key I go there very frequently as I have Sunday Monday Off, spend a good chapter of my life beeing there single, with my girlfirend, with my family, with my Wife, and now with my twin daughters. Everytime Im at Siesta Key I ko to my favorite place SKOB, Siesta Key Oyster Bar is the best !..
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Against!!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve been living in the Sarasota area for four years. I literally know the tea on everybody. There is nothing you can’t tell me about this town.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I’m the animal.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I have no clue what to tell you about this place. All i know is I’m drinking while i write and this looks like fun, so here i go. So, not too big on being a puppet; but y not. if yall dish out the liqueur i’ll move a lot quickueur. (see what i did there lol). I’ve been here since 2013, ex-Ringling student with nothing better to do; i have no money I’m broke af! so i’ve no boats and such and thangs, but I have a great since of humor, an i kinda like to make people laugh with my foolishness, LOOOOOOOOVE!!!! to party; if turning up was a job ya boy would make A Milli A Milli A Milli hahaha. So if ya need a fool on the show i guess holla at me? but if no then saylavee ; guess ill have to drink else where. ALSO! i think i would be a good addition to this show cause i know hella people just sayin, BOOM im out. p.s. while u read this… think of a black dude with a man bun talkin to you. That is how Clarence do. ONE MOOOORE THING! love uuuuuuu bye!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Bish wuh?
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I live here
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: None, that’s fucking wrong
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I am very well known in my community I feel as if I will bring the show a lot of viewers. I’m also funny with a beach body.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I wouldn’t say torture but I some what harass humans from time to time. Especially celebrities who tend to block me.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Ive lived in florida my entire life so i know the ins and outs of siesta key and sarasota
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I like to touture people verbally when they piss me off.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m a great actor. I love to turn up. I keep a positive vibe
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: lizards
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I was born and raised in Sarasota. I grew up in a middle class and I attended the visual performance arts school of Sarasota booker high school and middle. I graduated in 2014 and since then moved to Gainesville to attend school, after a rough year of medical issues I had to relocate home. After a year of saving up I decided to spread my wings and start school again in Tampa. Restarting school again after stopping a while will be hard but I’m committed to move forward and succeed! Sarasota and the key have always been my home 365 days somehow I always tend to go back but for now siesta key will have to wait for the summer. Like Chloe says ” summer in siesta key is like no other “
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Humans
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve lived here since I was 12. I’m 20 now. This is HOME
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: An ant
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: because I am am awesome and a sweetheart eveyone loves me
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I love sharks I love shark week
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve hooked up with at least 30 girls from Sarasota/Siesta Key. I once had sex with one of those Siesta Key sorority girls on the field in Doak Campbell Stadium at Florida State, 10/10 would recommend. I visit Sarasota every spring and summer break so I know Juliette and most of the cool kids and places to go in that area. The people I know there like to listen to the music I make, and love to party with me.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I would never torture an animal, that’s no fun. If I had to…. I’d go with torturing any guy that thinks it’s okay to rape girls. I’d probably lock them up in a room, tied to butter knives as they are forced to watch a video playing of me fucking those sister. Next question??
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: You don’t need an expert to tour Siesta Key, an eight mile long slip of land on Florida’s Gulf Coast in Sarasota County, as a perfect playground for families. It’s really a great, big beautiful beach. The water is clean. The sand is blazing white. A great place for families. Great for people who want to get away and unwind.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I’ma be 100% honest and it may not be a great answer but to me torturing a animal Is like torturing a human being and I believe that they can feel and understand exactly how we can in just different forms of it. So when we do that to an innocent animal it’s sad and cruel because to me all life in this world matters.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I mean I was born here!!! Lmao I know everything about his cityyyyy
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Y’all tryna b funny bout the one boy but I’d rather torture a cat maybe a mouse!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Born and raised in the area. Modeling now and thought why not give it a shot. I’m applying while at the gym and been told I belong on Jersey Shore.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I can’t imagine harming animals so I would choose people. But torture their emotions instead of physical harm.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m out going looking to have fun
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: i hate sharks they kill kids
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: It will be fun plus I live about 30-40 mins away from siesta key
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I live here
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I know this is fake
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I have lived in South Florida since I could breath and I grew up living in Sarasota. So, Siesta Key was always the go-to beach!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I prefer to torture and pick on humans because they’re always the best at fighting back!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m a uber driver and I lived in Sarasota for about 35 years
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Cats
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m Sarasota all the way. Born and raised. I’m telling you now i’m not from the rich side. I’m from Newtown. I can bring a personality and style to the show that will have viewers anticipating the next show as if it was Power or HAHN. I’m very attractive with a banging body. I’m a college athlete at this time getting ready for the 2018 NFL draft after this season. So you might as well stop looking for candidates because I am the one. My info is listed and i’ll be hearing from you soon. Oh yeah make sure you email me if I don’t answer because if it’s a number I don’t recognize I probably won’t answer ✌🠾
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I torture frogs. I hate those little ugly things. They are gross. I’ll boil water, grits, grease and let them have it. I don’t torture sharks. I don’t have no business even messing with them. They to big and I can’t outswim them. I can outswik Micheal Phelps but not a shark.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Because I like to drink party and fuck women
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Your mother
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I was born and raised in Sarasota, I’m as Floridian as they get. Never been on a plane or seen snow. If I’m doing anything outside of work or class it involves water or drinking. I’m a lot of fun and know how to keep a conversation. I think I would be a great part of your casting crew!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I’d rather torture people then I would any of those animals.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve lived here my whole life. I’ve thrown way more parties that that little bitch boy Alex and I have way more connections all around the board
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Alex komposssss
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I have lived in Florida since i was 7. Im from bradenton.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People who piss me off
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I am a local I’m 21, I have blue eyes blond hair, I love going to party’s, and love to have fun. I know everyone. So time I can be any but I pretty much an the alpha female of all my friends. I’m a server and bartender. I wanna show people the other side to Siesta key.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: My friends and I represent siesta key in the best way any group could. We watch the show now and just have so many things we know we could fix. Sarasota isn’t all about being rich it’s about the time you have and the friends and the life you make.. our group has drama you couldn’t even imagine and we think we could make the show worth watching, I enjoy the cast now but I know we have what it takes
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: None
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m fun, quirky, outgoing, & bubbly. I love to meet new people, party with friends & be in the sun! I’ve watched all the episodes of the show Siesta Keys so far & I love it!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I couldn’t torture any animal… but if I could, I guess it would have to be spider! Leg by leg!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: It will be the biggest mistake of television history if you don’t. 🙂
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Uhhh niether? I’m obsessed with dogs and terrified of lizards.. p.s there are a ton in Florida
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve lived in Sarasota for 14 years! I Know everyone and most people dislike me so definitely would be drama!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People!!!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I FUCKING LIVE HERERERERERERERERERERERERERERE
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: HUMANS
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: THE question you should be asking is ” Why haven’t I been chosen already”
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People!‚ Animals Are At Least Dependable
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve lived in Florida for 10 years and and the beach is my life
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I prefer torturing snakes because I’m terrified of them
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m a musican , I make people laugh & the girls love me ! Go check me out on SoundCloud , I promise we are next up ! Don’t believe me , check the link https://soundcloud.com/
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Neither , I love all the animals ! God created all them ! Expect snakes , fuck snakes , slimmy ass shuts
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve lived here since I was three and my sister dated Alex the fish murder!!!!!!!!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: None!!!!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Most of it is located on Lido
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: are humans animals?
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I have lived in Siesta Key/Sarasota for the past 5 years. Being from Chicago and coming to Sarasota has changed me! I play tennis at IMG Academy, which is a top prep school and sports complex in the nation. I know my way all around Siesta Key and Sarasota because I always cruise around in my blue BMW M2 finding new things to do and meeting new people. Everyone knows me at my school because of the cool cars I drive and my taste for style. I am usually very humble, but I also like to show off at times. Taking a different car out from my dad’s car collection to go a house party on Casey Key Rd. in Siesta Key to hangout with girls every Friday is what I’m there for.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I torture sharks when I have to because they kill people and that’s the worst thing that can happen while being at a darty on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve been going there every summer since I can remember as a kid , I know a lot of people in the area and things to do and places to go
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Birds
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: From California so I know beaches. Also, since California is a state with cities and towns, I know cities and towns, just like Siesta Key(which also happens to be a city and/or town).
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Tourists are a personal favorite of mine.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Born n raised baby.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Not my cup of tea I’m a vegan.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m a true born and raised Floridian! We are a rare breed in our own state! I’m also a lesbian, injured US Army veteran with a temper. I’ve lived in and around the Sarasota area my whole life, minus the years I was in the military. And yes, my father is rich as well! 🙂
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People are the best and only animals I like to torture, because we’re the true animals in this world.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Born and raised. Only 4 years off due to military.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Humans
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Because I’m a Blonde and I’m sexy what else do you need.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Alex Goliath fish it’s a new breed but I was told if you use women’s underwear as bait it’s very easy to catch whether you’re catching on a pole or catching an STD!!!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve been reading the news about this spoiled, entitled bunch
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: They are all fair game. God made them for us to torture. Well, all but my two dogs, three cats, and 9 chickens. Thems off limits
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve lived here for 6 years and always partying and drinking down at siesta. I love the beach throwing parties and have a nice car.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People of course I love making them jealous because I know I got what they don’t have 😉
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Absolutely nothing but I’m a Florida native which gives me bragging rights against literally everyone and anyone I work with
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Alt right
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Because when I grow up, I want be on a show a that supports Marine Life murders.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: MTV
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m a tall college swimmer, and I like beaches. I don’t think too much about anything–so I suppose that makes me an expert!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Barracudas, because I don’t like competition when I am trying to find new shiny things.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Ever series needs a random redneck
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I know the area like no other, I can bring African American fan base because I am known around the area. I workout, I’m 6’7″ 256 ex college football player who is trying to go back. I can really bring this show out and make headlines! I’m telling you give me a shot and I can make this show big!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Like I said before I use to paralyze lizards and wrap them in toilet paper and have them burn alive. But I also tortured cats before. I use to have a dog that use to eat cats. I use to catch cats also and throw them to my dog till my mom caught me and tore my ass up.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I have 4000 friends on Facebook … I watch every MTV show. Also I can make the show interesting. I’m pretty unique and fun. I love the party and meet new people … i’m not afraid to speak my mind. Also I can make drama and stick up for people and viewers .. let me know if I can be on MTV … you guys are awesome thank you for your time
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Fish or sharks I guess 🙁
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: You guys are awesome and this link is great!! Screw the animal abusing idiots and send em to rot in jail!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Live in SRQ
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: You have to be kidding! Never!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m an expert on fine dining
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Men
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m not no ones fucking puppet bitch but i can be on this show to help my self make millions and come out of the poverty
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Possums, raccoons they dead on site
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Because Im awesome and have lived here for 9 years
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: We have the number one beach in america. In general siesta key is a beautiful place to do a vacation at.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I dont torture animals .
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: numer one beach
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: dog
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Because I’m awesome and I feel I am tailor made for a show like this!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Lol none.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I live in a Guy Peterson mansion overlooking the Key. I spend my dad’s money on expensive liquor and guns (not for people bro, for pelicans. a good ol’ game of floridian duck hunt!) so he’ll realize cheating on my step mom with the coke whore down Fruitville will be the death of him, but hopefully not his business because that pays off my Maserati.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Gators, Florida Panther and those huge ass snakes are pests and need a good shock stick to the head. And there’s nothing like shooting a dolphin from the back of a yacht. Target practice brah!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve lived in the Bradenton/Sarasota area for 19 years now. I’ve visited siesta key 101 times. I love going to the drum circle and my favorite spot on siesta key is right by the red guard stand. I also love all the shops and clubs siesta key has to offer
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Ants lol I hate torturing animals though
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I love to hangout, drink and have lots of fun. Also feel like there is always drama in my life.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Bugs ? I don’t like spiders, ants. Etc.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I love watching this show and I can pretty much tell you anything about each character. I basically feel like I could be friends with them and be cool with everyone! I like to drink and party!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People, you know what I mean mmm lol I’m not going to torture an animal that’s going too far.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I love too drink beer , boating n just party i would be a good candiate because we make mtv twice as better by doing a party in cali
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: My x gfs shes a animal
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: i know everything bout sarasota i mean i was born here!!!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: ion b w/ nun of that but idek torture a snake
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: First off , i’m not a puppet so we’re going to get that straight. I’m a fun ass person , lit all the time . who wouldn’t want to hang out with me? i’m also nice and give everyone a chance but once you lie to me y’re going to regret that i promise you that. I love going to the beach, im the type of friend to have all my friends turnt at a party and hyping them up like i’m a hype man lol.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Hypocrite humans lol
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I love to have a good time, im pretty “go with the flow” but I just finished all my schooling to be a dental assistant and need a summer full of nights I won’t remember with people I won’t forget…not to mention all the handsome men…
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Men…
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: It makes me a expert because I like to workout a lot meet new people and to have fun to party. I’m goal oreiantinted chilled lay back dude and very active I love the beach and the weather can adapt real easy. I’m very funny as well.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: None of the above
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I love the beach.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Is this question for real ?
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m from new Albany Indiana, it is nothing but love, drama, and partying here. I’m 19 years old, I have a Siberian husky, I. Love going out with my friends and having fun, my dad is helping me open my own hemp oil store. I’m just a young girl who loves to have fun and fnd her ways threw life. I love to hang out with people and have a few drinks. My dad owns sk8 patches, he invented it a long time ago. He makes a ton of money by what he does. I hope maybe one day I could be on the show. It would be a dream come true.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Sharks
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I go to the University of Miami , but am taking my Spring semester off to “find myself” and work before returning to graduate in December of 2018. I currently live at the RBC in SRQ, but I grew up in NY spending my winters/summers/breaks in SRQ. I’m friends with a bunch of SRQ locals, and love to have fun
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: What! None. Love animals
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I am an expert on siesta key because I am about as extra as it gets and if their is drama to be passed around, well no one likes drama more than me. Also I love Garrett and his hot ass body. My favorite things are to workout in the morning and then drink and hang out with my friends the rest of the day. I am in a sorority that is practically what I do all day. I am like one of the richest in my soroity too so it is a perfect fit. Also being tan is one of my favorite things in the entire world so getting tan would not bother me.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Boys because they are so easy to tease. They are like dogs that want a bone, and you only have to wave it in their face. Torturing boys and watching their face gives me such pleasure. However, if we were to talk about a real animal it would probably be a cat. Cats can be just mean and they deserve to be tortured sometimes.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Well first off I’m an outsider in flordia. I’m a Mississippi Boy, but I live in flordia! So I’m a beach boy with a little twist cause of my country roots. I’m spontaneous and out goin! I’m usually the clown of the group and always noticed every where I go, because of my never meet a stranger attitude. Hanging out doing crazy crap is my middle name! And as far as the beer drinkin goes, well…… I got that in the bag! Pretty much my number one hobby.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I’d have to say my favorite animal to torture is seagulls! They piss me off!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Honestly you should pick me to be your puppet because I am a young fully functional male that can be manipulated on screen anyway you want. All you have to do is pull my strings and just like that I’m doing a jig and shaking up drink between my ass cheeks that I then proceed to stir in hers. I don’t claim to be an expert on Siesta Key because Siesta key is a natural talent of mine. I never had to go through rigorous training in everything Siesta key, because the siesta key chose me, when I decided yea! I am going to shotgun that beer and YEA! I am going to rep your max and oh is that your girl because I am feeling a little famished.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: This question is really really hard to answer because when it comes to animal torture. The whole fucking animal kingdom isn’t safe with me. Bears, Dogs, Crickets, even ladybugs, and they are supposed to bring good luck. That should show you that I am dedicated to this animal torture shit. But you want to know a favorite so Ill give you one…. HUMPBACK WHALES you ever seen a terrified whale BLOW ITS HOLE it kinda looks like an old woman right before menopause. You have a flurry of magnificent fluid then nothing, but the crusty capsule of what once was and damn was it a slippery slope up until this point.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I feel like i would bring a lot to the show! I’m a gay male who loves the beach life! everyone tells me i have the look for tv! I bring the drama the love and the swag to what ever i do! I just feel like i would bring something completely different to the show I’m a white male with a urban swag and back ground and i feel like it would be different and bring more diversity to the show! Maybe i could find love on the show who knows! And i musically talented I’m a rapper! I perform all over the coast line form Texas to Florida! I think i would be bomb as hell for the show!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I don’t torture animals so I’m gonna have to say people! My attitude can be cocky so i tend to have a lot of haters! So jealousy is big when it comes to me and other people so i torture folks with my ego
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I watch Siesta Key every time it comes on Mtv. I love to meet new people, work, and love to go out and have a great time with friends. I love to party, am very outgoing, and just want to have a good time. I plan on moving to florida in May and would love to be a part of the show!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I don’t torture animals at all. I have three dogs and wouldn’t think to even torture any animal or human being at all. it’s wrong to do and so sad to me.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve had tv experience before , my ex was on tv twice ( I wanna show him I am the life of the party ) , I’ve been studying this business since a child , lived in San Diego & LA I have connections. Also I’m a really cool awesome black guy !! I have the biggest crush on Tarik ! & Kelsey ! Haha I’m Bi that would add spice . I could bet my life you would not regret adding me to the show ! I’m very talented I sing design & model I have put into the universe that I can do it all. I also was picked to do real world but I decided to not show up to meet the producers just was not my path.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Pelicans , Birds period ! I am afraid of birds ! Long story. I call it my child hood horror haha
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve had tv experience before , my ex was on tv twice ( I wanna show him I am the life of the party ) , I’ve been studying this business since a child , lived in San Diego & LA I have connections. Also I’m a really cool awesome black guy !! I have the biggest crush on Tarik ! & Kelsey ! Haha I’m Bi that would add spice . I could bet my life you would not regret adding me to the show ! I’m very talented I sing design & model I have put into the universe that I can do it all. I also was picked to do real world but I decided to not show up to meet the producers just was not my path.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Pelicans , Birds period ! I am afraid of birds ! Long story. I call it my child hood horror haha
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Hi my name is Leah, I’m 23 and I live in Los Angeles. I am currently a nanny and I work at Equinox. I love living in Los Angeles because there is always something new to do but there is also a downside to living here because a majority of the people are fake and are just trying to make it to the top. I would say I’m the opposite of most people here. I am very down to earth and adventurous. I like to think I’m funny because I always am making my friends laugh. I love meeting new people and Ive never had a problem making friends or meeting guys but people in LA are so shallow and fake. Ive had a hard time finding a genuine connection with any guy here. From what I’ve gathered over the 3 years being here they all want just one thing. Im getting to a point in my life where I’m ready to find a good guy for me and would love to be on this show to find it. I just recently heard about it from a friend who was on the show and i think it would be an amazing experience for me to really learn about myself. Im a very fun and loving girl and I know I can make the right guy happy.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Ants 100%. i spray them the windex if I see them in my house.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’d be great on the reality show siesta key because I love to be on the beach. I have a good beach body and love to work out. I’m super friendly but take no shit!
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Definitely none
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: 23 Years young. Half of my family lives in Sarasota and Fort Myers. They have their own multi million dollar company called “Mabry brothers.” We are that family other family’s wish they could be. My uncle will rent out a whole campground for us all on a weekend just to get wild and have fun if it’s not at one of our houses. I’m in great shape. Fitness and Mma is my thing. I love to drink and party with friends/meeting new people. I’ll be that guy that makes everyone enjoy themselves no matter what is happening. Champagne and orange juice every morning sounds like a great way to start out the day. I love the water. I’m here for a good time. You can look me up on Instagram and see what you think 4thunter4. Thank you for the opportunity. Hope to hear back from you guys.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I’d rather not torture any animal haha but messing and annoying the hell out of people can get quite funny.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Snakes
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People I enjoy the laugh I get out of it I like messing with my friends pranking them and more.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I have spent most of my high school in the Siesta Key area. I went to Out of Door Academy, and was classmates with Amanda Miller as well. I love siesta key, and everything about it. I love spending time at the beach, tanning, and all around having a good time.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: If I had to pick an animal to torture, it would probably be a shark. Just because of how many shark attacks that have happened, and how many lives were lost because of sharks.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’ve been there done that. I know everyone in the keys. I run it. Im an aries originally from Boston in wicked fiesty you’ll see. Im Dominican. My best friend knows Gary. She convinced me to even want to audition. I’m a trip I have a huge sense of humor but like I said im fiesty. Keep that in mind family lol.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I’m not Alex
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: What makes me an expert on Siesta Key is that I love the beach and partying every night, but I also love the drama.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Because reality TV is so basic. Same old characters, rich, spoiled assholes and blondes. I definitely have the brains, common sense to be a different type of character. I also have not the “basic” type of interests like theater and music! AND I am foreign, I am from Poland so my appearance, communication, etc. is a little different than the average Floridian so it makes me a little unique for TV
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: people
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Expert? I’m far from it being as I’m a Texas kind of girl but don’t let that fool you. With my Texan roots, I love drinking, partying, and everything having to do with tanning, relaxing, and having fun! I think it would be fun to have an outsider on the show and moving from Texas to Florida would be a major step for me. I currently work as a cocktail waitress/bottle server/bartender at a nightclub in Austin, TX and could possibly find a job in Florida doing the same thing. I may be a petite brunette from the state where everything is bigger and better but just because I have country charm doesn’t mean I don’t have that Siesta sass.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: If by “torture” you mean “love unconditionally and want all the cuddles”…. then all of them! Animal lover 24/7!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m gorgeous, fortunate, outgoing, and I get what I want when I want it. What’s not to love, honestly? As far as I’m concerned, I would be the most talked about. All eyes would be on me and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I personally dislike animals very much. All kinds of animals to be exact. I’m actually quite terrified of dogs and cats mostly!!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I am extremely funny, I saw everything I want and never feel bad. I don’t like rude or nose in the air people. If u have an issue come to me. If not brace yourself. Getting on my bad side wouldn’t be pretty. I can be the nicest person or the meanest bitch. I live in Miami and work in the hottest nightclub. Everyone wants to know the pretty girl. Girls love to hate and want to be my friend and guys love to love me. Don’t mess with the Hot Girl. She fights back. I also have a sleeve which always catches people’s attention. I am nothing like any girl anyone’s met. I’ve been single 8 yrs but I know who I am and what I want. Don’t cross me or I’ll be sorry. I’m great for tv. I’m that bitch you’ll want to know and want more of. Trust me.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Humans. Haha.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I just believe whatever i stamp my name on it grows like a virus. I live off the 3’es which are Entertainment Energy Excitment, I also know me being British will add more of a international audience plus my charismatic and personality and superb smile. Basically I’m rich chocolate eye candy with the key ingredients to add value to the siesta family
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: I’ll torture people to the cows come home, getting the satisfaction of winding an individual up the wall until that lose the marbles is a blast. Who’s my next victim
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Im a whole new different character that nobody has seen yet, im a hype man, i do wild shit, and i dont give a fuck. Im guessing you need to a be a huge douche for this show and i got what you need.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: My dick, ill rub that shit till the skin falls off. But forreal i dont torture animals but my dick is one hell of an animal and thats the closest ill get to torturing an animal.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: You should choose me to be your quote on quote “puppet” for you next season because I have a lot I can bring to the table. Take that as you will.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Uh weird question…but If I had to pick a favorite animal to torture I would choose a human because quite frankly animals are way too sweet to torture; humans on the other hand are something else.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I’m not a conventional “muscle head” but I have 30+ years NYC acting training and experience. I don’t know a lot about the show, but I do hang out at Casey Key Fish House.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Definitely, humans. Anyone who thinks they’re more important than everyone else.
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I love to live life to the fullest and love to be around ppl who party and have fun.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Definitely people
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Not only have I lived in Florida my whole life but I definitely like hanging out and drinking with friends . Specially at the beach ! I loveeee having fun making memories going on trips and being spontaneous. Don’t see any true meaning in life if you don’t enjoy it ! Destroying my reputation and being the crazy one has been pretty much my life but idc I have fun doing it
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Siesta Key is the perfect place for me to be. I am currently a Animal Science major at Santa Fe College in Gainesville, Florida but in the summer it’s all about beaches, baes, and booze. Being the turn up king that I am it’s only right that I lead every into the right direction and also stand up for only the right things. People love to stir the pot but they forget I’m the only spoon. Why not take a chance to met new people who may be friends for life or enemies for forever? Either way you put it life is all about living while your here, living for others, and dying for someone.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: Siesta Key matches everything I work for in life. I work hard to train for my passion in tennis, workout every day and work on my instagram following by posting about fashion, workouts and where to workout, and great places to visit, drink and eat in the great Sunshine State. Whether its by traveling and seeing the best of what the world has to offer, eating the finest foods, and keeping up on the latest fashions, its up to us to make this life our BEST life. If you would like to get a glimpse of my life and my passions and dreams in life, please check me out at amandaangulo.com.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: Oh, mylanta! I’m a huge animal lover, but there are some people who deserve some good ol’ torturing!
What makes you an expert on Siesta Key?: I feel like I find my way into the drama and feel like the beach and the people you already have on the show would definitely be in a different light. I am a graduating college student wanting to move to a warm area and have a blast this summer but also stir up the drama.
What’s your favorite animal to torture?: People in a nice way , I feel as I do my best to stay out of drama but somehow always find myself in all of the mess. As I watched this show I related all of the drama back to my life.
