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Florida Man is Dead

Now that corporate media has fully adopted and monetized the “Florida Man” shtick, the whole thing has lost its appeal.

Florida Man has become the Mickey Mouse version of himself.

Florida Woman is usually just a never-ending supply of domestic abuse victims made to be punchlines.

“Journalists” take ironic or funny things out of one-sided arrest affidavits, and reduce complex human situations to mindless fodder in the shape of click-bait headlines. The stories that arise from that swamp of bias and half-truths are force-fed to the public so the 5 or 6 companies that own 90% of media outlets can sell more ads and distract people from important things.

WTF Florida purposely publishes shitty stories oozing with bias and inappropriateness, because there’s something funny about complete nonsense masquerading as professional news. It’s disturbing that mainstream news authors write identically.

Florida news is basically just click-bait that ridicules poor people who suffer from unjust drug laws, a lack of mental/physical health care, and the for-profit prison system. Recidivism is encouraged in this country because it’s profitable to a few, to the detriment of many. Ineffective, archaic “punishment” over effective treatment is the status quo.

News articles that make punchlines out of untreated mental illness and the hardships of poverty are just cashing in on the fact that the United States is the only large rich country without universal health care. This only exasperates the problem, as it provides even more financial incentive for the “justice system” and medical fields to remain terribly inefficient and unfair.

Side note: Not everyone who gets arrested is a “victim of the system.” Cognizant individuals who violate the consent of others, especially through violence, should be punished by jail or death.

The majority of arrestees should have never been jailed. Many of them need treatments of sorts, or access to quality jobs. People who get arrested for drugs and prostitution are simply having their rights trampled on by archaic and nonsensical laws. It’s wrong to keep ridiculing them.

So we’re taking a break for a bit.

Florida Man is dead. Perhaps we can revive him and his better half, Florida Woman, in new and exciting ways. We don’t how to do that yet. If you have any suggestions about what you’d like to see this site become, then please use the comments section below to share your ideas.

If you’d like to contribute to the site with articles, photos, memes and more, please consider becoming a Street Reporter.

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2 years ago