Orlando (WTFF) – A Florida man was arrested after deputies found narcotics and a little weed on him.
On Monday, at about 2:00 in the morning, an Orange County Sheriff’s deputy was patrolling around OBT and Clarcona Ocoee Road when he saw two white guys riding BMX bikes with no headlights. He pulled them over at a Kangaroo gas station parking lot (the police report says 6295 Clarcona Ocoee Road, which doesn’t show a gas station on Google Maps) and explained that it was against the law to ride a bike at night without a headlight and reflectors.
Then he asked the question that every Florida Man dreads… he asked if they had anything illegal on them.
Devin Michael Robinson (who was not arrested) said:
“I have a pocket knife.”
27-year-old Brett Michael Sexton said something a little different:
“I have a pocket knife on me and I may have a little weed.”
Brett reached into his pocket and pulled out what was probably dirt weed, as it was in a “red stamp baggie” in his wallet.
The deputy did more digging. Inside his wallet he found “what appeared to be a balled up dollar bill.”
He unballed it and saw that it was a “counterfeit $3 bill,” according to the arrest report. Unraveling it further revealed Florida Man’s favorite drug: meth.
The methamphetamine drug test came back positive.
So did the cannabis, which should be legal anyway.
Like most Florida Mans, Brett is not originally from Florida. He’s from Massachusetts. On his face is a tattoo of what looks like the Nazi Schutzstaffel logo.
Brett was arrested on charges on methamphetamine and possession of cannabis. The deputy asked Devin to take care of Brett’s bike, per Brett’s request. Literally meaning “Protection Squadron,” the were responsible for killing over 5.5 million victims during the Holocaust. Or the “SS” just stood for “Severely Stupid.”
He was transported to the Booking and Release Center without incident.